“Because I’m Worth It”
So, here’s the thing. I don’t go to a salon every 6 weeks like clock work to get my hair cut. I guess I’m on the bottom of my list of priorities, especially my hair. The other day I stepped out of the shower, got dressed, started blow drying my hair and froze. I looked in the mirror. More like stared. There they all were. “Look at them all.”, my mind said. It was like a club. A collective bunch that was not invited, yet rudely they showed up. It was like I was popped on the back of my head and snapped out of some haze and back into reality. I thought, “I can’t possibly be old enough to have that many……gray hairs!” I leaned on the counter because I felt a little light headed. So I finished drying my hair and went out and ran errands. While I was running said errands, I stopped by a local hair cuttery to ask if someone could squeeze me in. The nice woman with perfectly coiffed hair said, “oh absolutely.” Oh absolutely? Was this because she thought my hair was in as bad a shape as I did? And did everyone else think the same thing? Suddenly I was longing for my baseball cap. I got a wash n’ cut by a young girl (my regular “stylist” is a rock star and is booked like a month in advance)and it wasn’t the way I wanted it, but the length was gone and quite frankly, that’s what I needed.  So, off to Target and Walmart. I picked up a box of hair color. “Champagne” it said. What was MORE important was the claim that it offered 100% gray coverage, so I plucked a box from the shelf and threw it into my basket. I covered the box up with other “stuff” I was purchasing almost as if I were one of those people embarrassed to buy feminine products or condoms. I went straight to the “self check out” area and proceeded to ring in my items, bag them, pay for them and I was properly thanked, by the machine, for shopping at Walmart. I went home mixed the color and applied it immediately. The instructions said 25 minutes for light gray or 35 minutes for heavy gray. Lets just say I left it on for 50 minutes and leave it at that, k? I rinsed, I conditioned, I rinsed, I moussed and blew dry my new hair cut and was excited about the new color…but mostly, the eviction of the grays that were uninvited! My hair is no longer mousey brown with grays, it’s not even Champagne blonde which is what the box promised. My hair is now strawberry blonde. No matter what color I pick, it comes out strawberry blonde. My stylist said it’s because “it comes out of a box.” but I’m thinkin’ it’s a conspiracy. ANYway, most of the grays have disappeared, but there are a few rouge strands that railed against the coloring process. I’m going to have to fight back by going back to the store to purchase a highlighting color combo. With a few strokes of the highlighting brush those grays will no longer be gray, but strands of “blonde”. I’ll teach THEM to show up uninvited. I’ll chemically beat them into submission!
 The moral of this story? There isn’t one. Well maybe one. Make sure you go get your hair cut and colored every 6 weeks and stop being so cheap! You’re more important than that spare room you’ve been meaning to paint!